Thursday, February 16, 2006

A quick note to Vice President Dick Cheney.

Dear Vice President Dick Cheney

On behalf of Comedians, Humorists, Satirists, Cartoonists and their fans...


The last time comedians had this much fun with a VP it was over a spelling error.

To quote Jon Stewart, "Vice President Dick Cheney accidentally shot a man during a quail hunt ... making 78-year-old Harry Whittington the first person shot by a sitting veep since Alexander Hamilton. Hamilton, of course, (was) shot in a duel with Aaron Burr over issues of honor, integrity and political maneuvering. Whittington? Mistaken for a bird."

To quote David Letterman, "Good news, ladies and gentlemen, we have finally located weapons of mass destruction: It's Dick Cheney."

To quote Jay Leno, "Cheney's defense is that he was aiming at a quail when he shot the guy. Which means that Cheney now has the worst aim of anyone in the White House since Bill Clinton."

To quote Craig Ferguson, "You can understand why this lawyer fellow let his guard down, because if you're out hunting with a politician, you think, 'If I'm going to get it, it's going to be in the back.'"

To quote Jimmy Kimmel, "But all kidding aside, and in fairness to Dick Cheney, every five years he has to shed innocent blood or he violates his deal with the devil."

To quote, Garrett Morris, "I'm gonna get me a shotgun and kill all the whities I see, I'm gonna get me a shotgun and kill all the whities I see. When I kill all the whities I see, then whitey he won't bother me, I'm gonna get me a shotgun and kill all the whities I see".

Stay Tuned

Tony Figueroa
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